Sunday, May 31, 2009
Louis Kahn was this amazing architect, but he has a flaw of having multiple families – three to be exact. The movie I was watching was actually his son who goes on this “discovery” to find out who his father really was. He meets with the other women, people he worked with and visits almost every building ever built. It’s a very cool documentary. It inspired me in more ways than one.
But anyways I got this idea about “the single person” and love itself. What do you do if you found your great love and it doesn’t love you back? What if you spent your life looking for someone and something that involved a deep connection the ultimate love affair with yourself and another person, what do you do when your only chance is to be with them, or nothing else?
Do you settle for less? What if you couldn’t settle, what if nothing could compare to what you already had (or thought you had) in life.
These “other women” of Louis Kahn, there were so enamored with Louis Kahn, years later being left by him to be a single mother and raise children on their own, they still love and dream and long for Louis. They don’t have any negative emotions towards him, they believed their love was true and the other women didn’t matter to them. And it just baffled me.
Do you give up freedom and a chance for all that you deserve for a man you love? Do you pass on any other opportunity just for the slight chance of hope that you could be with the “one” you have been waiting for? Maybe its like a boxing match, you keep getting back up and you wont leave the ring or give up without your fight.
I’m personally the type who doesn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me and I wouldn’t waste so much energy on something that didn’t give me back so much energy. I would be furious about these other women, and although I can understand their relentlessness to give up and move on, but really, are they happy longing for a man they can never have. (especially after he died and 40 years later the women were still single longing for him still.)
But this whole situation gets me thinking about “the single person” there are two types of people in this world, those that are constantly in relationships even with people that make no sense just because they cant be alone, and those that refuse to settle for anything less than they think they deserve (or refuse to settle for someone who doesn’t make them happy.) I believe the single person is single by choice because they don’t want to settle. I always think its bullshit when people say that the single person is single by choice because that’s what they choose – well yeah they choose to not be with just anyone but the single person usually doesn’t want to be single. they just know what they want and they know what they think they deserve.
But when you settle, what are you doing? What are you missing? What are you gaining? I would imagine if you are with someone to “pass the time” you are missing out on anything and everything and your only gaining maybe a little less of self loathe or something. Your definitely not going to meet someone else or someone new while your with another person.
But “I’m young, who said I knew shit about love?”
“I’m an observer, I watch and I absorb and the people in my life are a great example of love” Louis Kahn.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
he is the cutest little puppy and does all the little puppy things that they only learn with time, like about running into doors and windows, when you say "NO" it doesnt mean run over and kiss my face. and if you tug and play with the blinds chord, the blinds will come down on your head. BUT these superficial puppy traits are adorable, like how he will litterally jump from 2 feet away to jump on me and start kissing me. He is quite small and he doesnt exactly know how to get on and off the bed, sometimes he jumps off and just rolls and sometimes getting on the bed he gets stuck and cant make it all the way up, but he hasnt learned to bark yet so he just whines a little bit and looks at me with puppy dog eyes that say "help me." he can spend HOURS chewing on something stupid like a waterbottle cap (dont worry hes not big enough for the bottle cap to be too small.)
he chews his tail, he rolls on his back and arches sideways and chews his tail. it is ADORABLE
he chews on my hair -- thats not so adorable.
when i take a bath or a shower, i HAVE to bring him in the bathroom with me or he flips out, BUT because of this he panic-ly trys to climb up the side of the baththub and really seriously freaks out so he insists on being in the shower with me, he just roams around the shower floor trying to catch shower droplets happily.
i am a proud mother and i devote one hour a day to taking him to the sculpture park to lay out, play with him let him see other dogs and other people. and in return, he loves me oh so much.
he wont go out on my balcony i dont know if its because my railing is glass and he thinks he is going to fall off, but he refuses.
he chews waterbottles, i let him, they entertain him and he attacks them as they slide away from his "grip"
he is offically the love of my life.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
so thats my grandpa on the left, isnt he cute? haha joking, half of you probably know i'm lying cause thats the great Philip Johnson we will get to him later.
I feel completely inspired today so I will let my blog be inspired by my fabulous Aunt Joo (pronoucned Jew)
what im obsessed with listening to: "Bartender Song" By Rehab. I know now all the words.
last purchase on Itunes: tonight i just bought a lot of the new Ray Lamontage and Ingrid Michaelson
What i'm reading: this book about audrey hepburn called "what would audrey do?" i love it, its really good. i'm also reading this great book about Philip Johnson its essentially a gigantic interview with him.
what im drinking: Diet Coke of course, i'm risking staying awake all night by drinking caffeine this late but I figure i'll just take a nyquil anyways, haha. no worries, i'm not a druggie I promise.
what im working on: a project on Philip Johnson which includes a full scale model of his glass house made out of real glass with stained glass techniques. a project taking Seattle's Denny Park and turning it into an ADA park called "Divercity Park" (that one is to detailed to describe in a couple sentences) but it will as well have a real architectural model. i'm working on a zen retreat that has two rooms, one for waking up in the morning and the second for relaxing at night time. my last project is more like a research project on human comfort and how we as humans truly play into our environments as we deal with heat, color, vision and everything. luckily 3/5 of these projects are group projects.
word of the day. INSPIRATION. i realized today I am very heavily influenced, i dont know if that makes me gullible (because i am entirely) and i dont knwo if there is another word for it and i dont know if its a bad thing but I AM very heavily influenced, but i like it. it gets me going and gets me excited. (if you knew me during the presidential campaign, you know exactly what i'm talking about...)
sometimes its a periodical infatuation which I think my Philip Johnson infatuation is right now, I've had the same infatuation with Andy Warhol, Richard Nixon, Hunter S Thompson. these people intrigue me and for a time period i'm obsessed, after that it becomes a little more causal, as it does with any relationship in life. but if i can watch a movie or documentary or a read a book about these people, i will, because they fascinate me. i dont know that everyone knows this about me, i love to just research and read about certain people, NOT tabloid kind of stuff and almost everyone i'm infatuated with, is dead, its something about being able to look at a persons life as a whole, but i love it, its a small quirky passion of mine. even right now i feel that my energy level is just sky high and i will have to read through this blog like 20 times just to make sure it makes sense
i have two heroes, idols, main lifelong inspirations in life and thats Audrey Hepburn and Barack Obama, nothing about them will ever cease to amaze me I will never stop reading about Audrey or Barack and I know the world is a better place today because they once graced our planet.
there is something inside myself, i've just realized this at this very moment. i dont know the word for it, maybe you will. when I love something, i LOVE it, I have a life long passion for it. I've known and had this passion for interior design since 7th grade and its stuck ever since, i fell in love with Audrey Hepburn years and years ago and I havent stopped being infatuated, the same with Barack Obama and the city of Seattle, when i really love something I really dont "move on" from it. its not something like tradition or getting "stuck in a rut" because thats really not the issue at all. The other thing about me, and i'm getting much better about it, but its kind of like if its something that doesnt work for me, then i'm done with it. I used to not really put up with people I didnt like, and I didnt do things I didnt want to do, as I get older I realize thats stupid and makes me look like a bitch so I suck it up when I have to. (but of course, if there is an appropriate way of getting around something that you don't have to do, or getting around/away from dealing with someone you don't want to, isnt it smart to take that advantage? I sure think so.)
what is the word for that type of person? dedicated? because i really can be, when its something worth being dedicated to anyways...
I have no idea if this blog makes ANY sense at all. so enjoy :) i'll leave you with another great work of Philip Johnson;