Monday, February 23, 2009


besides from my Obama praise I havent ever really written on this blog about my personal values or my true political beliefs, and i'm going to make a big whammie and have the first thing i deeply talk about, be about religion, my lack of and my reasoning.

first of all, i'm inspired by it tonight because i just finished watching "Religulous" Bill Mahers religion documentary. If you haven't seen it, i recommend it but look at my other blog "everyones a critic" for my movie review on that because i got more important fish to fry in this post! :)

i was raised catholic, my parents, my whole family are all catholic. i was baptized and went to CCD (Catholic sunday school) and i think for a little while i bought some of the "stories" but i dont think it was ever something i was apart of, i remember when i was a little girl, i dont remember how old or anything i just remember kneeling in church with my parents and i had just learned about praying to God and everyone would say "God will answer you, God will speak to you" and i told my mom "Mom, i don't hear God's voice" and she said "just listen harder" but i never did hear his voice, and i never expected too.

lately, and especially over the last year, religion has been a very though-provoking issue on my mind. I always toyed with what i believed in and i never really thought my answer could be "i dont know"

i have no idea how the earth and the solar system came to be, i have no idea how my body is on this earth and how it works the way it does (beyond science) but to me personally, i cannot accept that this God figure invented it because so many people believe its true. i cant just believe something because someone tells me its the truth.

I believe something created us and put us here, i dont know what. I dont know what happens to us when we die and i dont know if there is a hell. and i dont think anyone knows, now its very important for me to explain that i dont dismiss religion and faith, i dont frown upon it and say its stupid and wrong and blah blah. its just something i personally dont have and i truly envy people that do have faith. i think its a great thing to be able to have in your life and I think it truly does help people hold onto a life they deserve.

but what Bill Maher's documentary opened up for me, is that its okay to not believe and follow a religion, and he mentions in the movie that he feels more free not having a faith and i believe that as well. for me, the way i see it, is i dont need a bible or a religion to tell me whats right or wrong. i dont need a bible to tell me not to kill someone (which they touch on in a movie in a very interesting interview with a religious senator) i dont need a religion to tell me to live my life good and to do good things.

i live my life with good intentions and i live my life with good morals and with the thought of good deed.

this doesnt mean that i set myself all these really easy standards for myself of how i'm going to live, for the most part i pretty much follow the ten commandments. I know its wrong to steal, cheat, murder etc. and i would never feel okay even thinking about doing any of those things.

the most interesting point i have to put out there, God is well he's God-like, hes all power-ful, he is all knowing, he is all good. correct? yes. well then how do bad things happen in the world? the devil? well if God is all powerful why doesn't he extract the devil? why can't he prevent the devil from doing what the devil does? and God is this great guy but if you don't follow him or believe in him your going to hell, well thats not very nice. and if i ever believe in another God i'm going to hell. and as Bill Maher pointed out, shouldnt God be devoid of a petty human emotion like jeaulously?

i do admire and envy people who have faith, in a healthy way. and i respect them, and i think they should respect me the same. I am not bashing religion, im simply explaining why i personally cannot believe in it.

i guess my religion is good intentions, good morals and hope.


  1. I tried posting earlier but it wouldn't let me just like mine won't let anyone post lately either. The captcha just says LOADING and it never does so you lose your post. So here's a test.

  2. OK, so now it's okay. What the hell is wrong with mine! HELP!